The day his wife of 20 years walked out on him changed Phillip's life. He never saw it coming and was completely taken by surprise and hurt, but most of all, felt a betrayal and immense pain straight to the gut that only she at the time could deliver. He thought she was “the one”. He thought she was his ride-or-die and the only person who truly knew him. He thought she was his soul mate, but he was wrong.

This is Phillip's story…

Let me start by introducing him. His name is Phillip Morton. He lives in the mountains of North Carolina. He's a father, writer, photography artist, former husband, and also autistic.

 While he does not let health issues define him, they are a significant part of his life. In 2007, he was diagnosed with RA (Rheumatoid Arthritis). At this point, he had been together with his ex-wife for about 12 years, and he worked as a chef and kitchen manager for a local restaurant (a job that he loved).

 Phillip had dreams and ambitions. His dream was to open his own restaurant serving a fusion of home cooking and Tex-Mex. He also planned to open a non-profit camp for underprivileged youth. He and his wife, along with a couple of friends would open the camp, and provide horseback riding, rock climbing, and many other activities that would benefit troubled kids. He wanted to make a difference in the world, and at the time, he was determined and ready to get to work doing just that. 

 However, his RA had a different set of plans.

 He started experiencing extreme pain in his spine, and severe joint pain, and before long any level of physical activity was putting him down for at least a few days. Eventually, he could not work doing the job he loved and the dream of opening his own restaurant and non-profit camp faded away.

Having RA led to other problems such as diabetes from the steroid medication that he had to take, heart troubles, and kidney stones. In addition, he's also been diagnosed with severe asthma, allergies and sleep apnea. Leaves, dust, and most irritants aggravate the RA and cause a flare-up that can put him down for several days. And, as if that’s not enough, the RA has irreparably damaged his spine to the point where there are days he can’t walk and at times has had to be in a wheelchair. 

There are life-changing surgeries Phillip needs, but government disability does not cover all of the costs, and he does not have the several thousand-dollar co-pays required to have them, because the money received monthly from Social Security is barely enough to survive on and hardly covers food and essentials. Most months he must choose between taking meds or eating.

So, when I say a punch to the gut, I mean it. At the worst time of his life and when he needed her most, his wife walked out and served him divorce papers on his 49th birthday, and the divorce became final on his 50th birthday. She drained his savings, took out loans on their home, and eventually, he felt he needed to leave and let her move back in to create a stable home for their son who at the time was a teenager. Phillip being sick with RA made it very difficult to give him the care and attention he deserved, and at the time, he felt it was the right thing to do. 

His soon-to-be ex-wife moved back into their home which made it impossible for him to continue living there. So, he moved into an old van with his Amazon parrot Pebbles (who is a rescue) and had it towed to his sister’s house since it didn’t run and needed a lot of repairs. He and Pebbles have been there ever since. Never in a million years did he think he would end up homeless, and while his sister does all she can to help, she has her own challenges and responsibilities.

 In early 2023, a friend of Phillips's convinced him to open a GoFund Me so he could have the van life essentials like a mini-fridge, ventilation fans, heater, etc. He was able to acquire a few items to survive the North Carolina mountain winter as well as much-needed medications.

Unfortunately, the money ran out and he is right back to where he started except for still having the van life essentials.

 To say his financial situation and health issues have made him feel like less of a man is an understatement. While what has happened to him is out of his control, he still feels like he's been unable to provide, protect, and perform the duties most men do daily on autopilot. The innate need to fulfill these duties has taken its toll on him. The thoughts he talks about experiencing have been very dark, and he has fallen into a depression and hole that he didn’t think he could crawl out of. In addition, being autistic makes it very difficult to express his emotions and properly talk to friends and family, which most times leads him to handle things on his own.

But, there is light at the end of the tunnel…

In recent years, an amazing thing happened that changed his life for the better. Her name is Sofia, she is from Portugal, and Phillip met her almost 3 years ago on Instagram. She liked his poetry and photography, and he liked her art. They both discovered that each of them is autistic, which made the connection even stronger. Soon, they were consistently conversing and becoming friends and confidants. She kept apologizing for her broken English which he was able to help her with, and she was able to help him by providing someone who would soon become his best friend.

About a year ago, they both realized they were in love. Honestly, Phillip knew before then, but as with any relationship, romance takes time to blossom. They both longed to be with each other with only distance and money keeping them apart. During this time, Phillip made some sacrifices, and with a little help, and a lot of luck from the Universe, he was able to fly to Portugal and make a surprise proposal to her on June 27th, and of course, she said yes.

Unfortunately, after a short visit, he had to leave and fly back to the U.S. When he got home, he immediately started the paperwork necessary to begin a new life in Portugal with Sofia. Both decided Portugal’s weather is far milder than the mountains of North Carolina which would benefit his RA. They have a better healthcare system and more help for disabled people. She lives in a metropolitan area which makes it easier to go to doctor’s appointments and there is public transportation all around. Not to mention, he and Sofia would live in her house that always has running water, a working toilet, and a shower. Things most people take for granted, but Phillip learned through his journey are quite the luxury.

In addition, social life and connections to others would greatly improve. Sofia is a teacher and artist. The opportunity alone to connect with other artists, autistic people, and overall like-minded thinkers would be incredibly beneficial to Phillip's mental health and well-being.

Phillip does not like to ask for help and assistance, but in this case, he really needs your help and support.

It was an absolute miracle for him to make the trip to propose, and he needs another miracle to make it to his new home in Portugal to be with Sofia to improve his life. Any amount, even a few dollars, is greatly appreciated and will make a difference in recovering from the devastating life and health events that have now shaped his existence. A new start would mean the world, would greatly improve his health and well-being, and be a very positive change in his life.